It may controversial but..

Is it just me, or is anyone else over all the “controversial” posts everyone puts up these days? I am so over someone’s person opinion of what they feel works for their family being labelled as controversial. I don’t agree with most things I read, I have a very particular idea of how I intend to bring up my child but that does not mean I judge others for their choices. 
I haven’t breastfed my baby since she was 2.5months old, she has slept in her nursery since we came home from Adelaide (at two weeks old). She eats packet baby food, loves her dummy and sometimes sleeps in our bed. My choices probably make many shudder,  I mean who would give their baby food that wasn’t organic? But to that I say a big eff you! My choices are exactly that, my choices. If you are not hurting anyone, then really it is no one else’s business! 
To anyone who is co-sleeping, exclusively breastfeeding, exclusively bottle feeding, to the Mummas that work full time and the ones that are staying at home with their kids, I give you all, a big high five! We are all working towards the same goal to bring up wonderful children, in a sometimes shitty world! So next time you find yourself labelling someone, or judging perhaps you should shut up and try giving them a pat on the back instead!
We are all doing a wonderful job, the only way we know how! 

#likeaqueen

While scrolling through Facebook the other day I saw Constance Hall post about the queen in her life and was asking others to do the same. The queen could be anyone that you consider to have had the most impact on your life, on who you are or just is point blank –  kick arse! I thought it was a fabulous idea and thought there was no better way to share then here on my blog!

    
The queen in my life is my mum! No surprise to most I’m sure! She has impacted my life in ways she probably will never know, she has helped and supported me in becoming the person I am today and is just all round a kick arse Mumma! We have gone from being just mother and daughter to the best of friends and she has done everything in her power to do whatever she can for my brother and I. Now I am married and have my own offspring she does whatever she can for my husband and baby too! 
My mum taught me to be myself, to stand up for I believe was right and shown me its okay to be different from everyone else! She encouraged me (and my brother) to chase our dreams to never give up and be grateful for what we had. I was taught people deserve second chances, but sometimes they don’t! That no bullshit means never having to pretend and that lieing means always having to remember the lie! We grew up spoilt but appreciative. We were spoilt with time and love just as much if not more, then with things. 

Mum was 23 when she had me, 19 when she got married. 30 years later they are still together, some days she wants to kill my dad, don’t we all (sorry Nev) but they are still there working as a team. Their relationship taught me its okay to speak your mind, that all should be equal and how wonderful it is to come home to a happy house everyday! 

I hope one day my daughter and I can have half the relationship me and my mother have. That she follows the same morals and ethics that my mother passed on to me. That she is stands up for herself and becomes her own person! Because that’s the legacy my mum would like to see! 

Don’t lose yourself now that the baby is here! 

I know everything changes when you have children and they become your whole world. I know that we as parents put their needs before our own and to be honest I truly believe we should. I know that we should be the ones that accommodate them into our lives not the other way around but I am a true believer in that we as mothers can still be us. We are still entitled to some reward for doing the best we can for our offspring. 

Now let me clarify I do not mean that if before kids your Wednesday to Sunday nights were spent out partying that you should continue on with that lifestyle. I do not mean if pre children you spent all your disposable income on unnecessary luxuries and lived off two minute noodles for the week that you should do the same now your baby has entered the world. 

What I mean is that every now and then, things are still allowed to be for you, you can still travel to exciting places with your children in tow, you can still buy something expensive and unnecessary. You can still have a day to yourself and not feel guilty because we all deserve it once in a while. The only difference being things may have to be planned for, budgeted for or talked about with your partner. 

When we become parents we change, knowingly or not, I’m unsure but it is inevitable and I believe necessary. We need to adapt to our new life and we can’t always be who we used to be. However we don’t need to lose ourselves entirely. I have changed since Rhemy and I am happy with that. You can’t be the same person when your baby comes as you become less selfish, more paranoid, guilt surfaces easier and your camera feed becomes filled with photos of your baby and not much else. 

While I say to not lose yourself entirely, I also say not to fight the changes in yourself either. They are happening because of your new addition and will help you on this new, exciting, sometimes scary journey of parenthood. 
Comment below and give me your thoughts xx 

📷 featured image: beautythroughimperfection.com 

I am mother! 

The day Rhemy was born, I was so overwhelmed at her arrival ( and rightfully so) that I didn’t realise that I was born again too. I was no longer just a woman, I was and am a mother. No more are my thoughts my own and no longer does my day consist of things to only benefit myself. 
Everything on the news now frightens me more, because now I have Rhemy to worry about as well. I hate to see children going through any type of ordeal, because what if they happened to my child! 

The temperature in our house is under surveillance 24/7 so that she is not too hot or too cold. I keep an eye on my watch like a hawk, not because I care what the time is, or have any where to be but because I like to know what is coming next in Rhemy’s routine. 

It took me a while to notice these changes in myself, perhaps they hadn’t occurred straight away, although I am convinced they did. 

I am now stronger and more confident in myself, however at the same time, I am more vulnerable too. I am interested in things I would have yawned at once before and love how much Rhemy makes me want to learn and take in.

Dynamics in my friendships have changed, and by that I do not mean the friendship has suffered in any way, just that it has altered. Luckily for me my close friends are happy for a pram to accompany us to lunch or coffee, or to come to my house when it is too hard to get out of the house. We have functions that a baby is fine to attend or ample notice is given if not so I can make other arrangements. 

I am grateful that I have this is my life. I know many people feel isolated when they become parents because they have friends who do not have children or understand what it means to have them, so instead of being flexible and adapting slightly for their friend, they just stop inviting them to things. 

I am me, a newer version, a better version. I have grown and changed in ways I know not only benefit me but also my cub!

 I am a mother! I am her mother! 

Now I ask you, to comment what changes you noticed in yourself. To like the post if you enjoyed it and share it if you would like others to read. 

Until next time!