When you become a mother you start putting someone else before you. All of a sudden things that mattered to you before seem so insignificant that you almost can’t believe they were once so important. While I think this is a good thing and that our children should always come first, I also believe in taking the time to look after yourself too.
Each of us are different and what soothes us and rejuvenates one person, doesn’t another. Some of us need a night out, dancing, drinking and forgetting our troubles (I’m not that person, the thought of a hangover is enough!). Some of us like to get pampered, mani- pedis anyone? Some of us like coffee with friends or just being able to take the time to apply a small amount of makeup and feeling a little bit put together.
Me, I like coffee (wine) with friends, breakfast dates with my mum and movies (after Rhemy has gone to bed) with my husband. These all make me feel whole, like I’m my own person. Most of the time, I have Rhemy in tow and that’s okay, I don’t need to be away from baby to have ‘me’ time. I just want something that doesn’t include baby toys, songs or cartoons. A bit of time out of the house, doing something different keeps Rhemy happy too and to me that’s a huge bonus!
So I say, try to do whatever you feel makes you feel like your own person, somewhat human, as often as you can. While I strongly believe our children shouldn’t have to make compromises, that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t make time for keeping you happy and healthy. Because if mum (or dad) aren’t happy neither is baby!
Before I was a mum, I used Instagram to follow friends, the occasional celebrity and for searching hashtags of whatever products I was lusting after that month. Now that I am quiet a regular on Instagram I have become addicted to the world of instagramming mothers!
Whether they are fellow bloggers, brand reps for companies or the owner of small businesses (such as my talented friend who made the gorgeous pixie bonnet Rhemy is wearing above). They are everywhere, uploading photos by the masses of adorable babies,toddlers and children, and the following is just as huge as those contributing! Everyone that is part of this community tries to support each other’s business and their children are often snapped wearing a multitude of brands.
I personally find it so uplifting and inspiring that such a group exists. While some may not like that it is online, I do. It’s convenient and available when you are. I love seeing how creative some mothers (and fathers) are. It is impressive to see how much a one or two person team can produce. It motivates me to blog more, to try and better myself in my life.
Next time you find yourself wanting to buy something for someone in your life, not even necessarily for children, do yourself and search #shopsmall or #supportsmallbusiness on Instagram you may be surprised by what you come across.
Links for items Rhemy wears in featured image;
‘Rosie’ Pixie bonnet: Bear and Scout
Linen suspender bloomers: Penny n Co
I sat down to write and I wasn’t sure if this is a topic I should really touch on or not. But I figured we’ve all done it, we’ve all had it done to us and right now we are probably considering it. The good old “unfriending” on social media!
To be completely honest, this is one of the things I hate about social media the most! In “real” life when we are sick of someone or hurt by something they did, we avoid them for a while or stop talking to them all together. On Facebook when you push that unfriend button, the person you have “unfriended” may not be aware straight away but eventually they will know! It’s kinda shit! It creates unnecessary ill feelings and it is very easy for people to become caught up in how many “friends” they have and why someone would choose not to accept their friend request or to delete them from their list.
I have over 500 friends on Facebook and how many do I talk to? 50, maybe more but certainly not often! How many have I unfollowed so I don’t have to see their stuff? More than I’d like to admit! I try not to delete friends because I would hate for them to know, but I have been guilty of it in the past. I make no apology for that. I have also been deleted and blocked and that’s okay.
I feel this part of social media can create issues, people get so caught up in popularity online and it eventually consumes them. Technology is so advanced that most things can be done at the press of a button. Truthfully I love it, but it means that people can act on their emotions and can do things that maybe once they had settled down or had time to think, they wouldn’t have? That includes airing their dirty laundry, but that’s another story for another day.
What do you think? Let me know below!
📸 featured image: thegoodvibe.co
Does anyone else feel like you have blinked and it’s already nearing the end of February? I swear it was a month ago Rhemy was born! She is now 7.5 months and the most roll-a-licious bub going round! She has said “dada” “bub” and “mum” although she certainly favours “dada” not to everyone’s excitement haha!
She is so close to crawling, that it is just frustrating for her! She rolls and pushes her self around everywhere and I can’t take my eyes off her for two seconds! She’s sassy and hilarious! She loves the theme songs to nearly every Disney junior cartoon and has a huge soft spot for Doc Mcstuffins! She wears a size 0 and I don’t think she will be too far out of a moving up to a size 1! If only they made them a tad shorter! 🙈 Lunch and dinner are when she has solids and she eats so much of it! Her bottles aren’t wanted nearly as often and she watches everyone eat, waiting for them to share!
She has started waking through the night again! I’m missing my beauty sleep for my little miss wanting company! Don’t get me wrong I love just hanging out with her but not at 2am! She screams when she doesn’t get her way and is so rough with her toys! She has no teeth yet and vomits very often! On the floor, on her clean clothes, on my face!
All of this just makes Rhemy, Rhemy! I wouldn’t have her any other way! Bring on the next 7.5 months of adventures but it can slow down!
While scrolling through Facebook the other day I saw Constance Hall post about the queen in her life and was asking others to do the same. The queen could be anyone that you consider to have had the most impact on your life, on who you are or just is point blank – kick arse! I thought it was a fabulous idea and thought there was no better way to share then here on my blog!
The queen in my life is my mum! No surprise to most I’m sure! She has impacted my life in ways she probably will never know, she has helped and supported me in becoming the person I am today and is just all round a kick arse Mumma! We have gone from being just mother and daughter to the best of friends and she has done everything in her power to do whatever she can for my brother and I. Now I am married and have my own offspring she does whatever she can for my husband and baby too!
My mum taught me to be myself, to stand up for I believe was right and shown me its okay to be different from everyone else! She encouraged me (and my brother) to chase our dreams to never give up and be grateful for what we had. I was taught people deserve second chances, but sometimes they don’t! That no bullshit means never having to pretend and that lieing means always having to remember the lie! We grew up spoilt but appreciative. We were spoilt with time and love just as much if not more, then with things.
Mum was 23 when she had me, 19 when she got married. 30 years later they are still together, some days she wants to kill my dad, don’t we all (sorry Nev) but they are still there working as a team. Their relationship taught me its okay to speak your mind, that all should be equal and how wonderful it is to come home to a happy house everyday!
I hope one day my daughter and I can have half the relationship me and my mother have. That she follows the same morals and ethics that my mother passed on to me. That she is stands up for herself and becomes her own person! Because that’s the legacy my mum would like to see!
Well as many first time mamas know, it is certainly a journey finding your groove in this whole new world of parenting. The type of parent you thought you would be, you normally end up nothing like. The time to yourself you thought you would miss, you don’t at all. The things you thought you wouldn’t cope with (dirty nappies, sleepless nights) don’t seem anywhere near as bad as you had imagined.
It is literally like I am learning blindfolded. Every time I feel like I am getting the hang of this mothering thing, Rhemy goes and changes something and I am lost all over again! I find some days exhausting and others a breeze! I can read her ques like no one else and can’t get enough of everything she does. Everytime she does something for the first time, it is the first time I have seen someone learn them too! Every milestone for her, is a milestone for me!
I’ve developed a dependance to Nespresso and a tolerance to kid’s tv shows! I have an unhealthy obsession with baby headbands and clothes. I love being with my little girl everyday. I find myself doing the most ridiculous things to get that one small laugh! I suck at nursery rhymes so I sing whatever I can, cause it makes her happy! I don’t need the sleep I once did and as long as she looks gorgeous when we leave the house, who gives a shit about what I look like? To be honest I like who I have become since Rhemy! Whether I meant to or not, I changed and I think for the better. I was selfish before, most young people are. Now while I believe parents deserve to be spoilt sometimes, the children should come first! I have done that. She gets whatever she needs or wants and if that means we go without so be it!
Comment below, share our changes, our experiences and obsessions !
I was listening to triple j on the radio yesterday and they were talking about Instagram and social media in general creating unrealistic expectations in people’s lives. They were referring to “clean eating” and all the gym selfies and how young and old people alike are putting pressure on themselves to be like these b grade celebrities.
To be honest I couldn’t agree more, I think that the comparisons and expectations go much further then just gym selfies. I believe people compare their everyday life with the glorified version celebrities and even their friends share on social media. People are only going to share good moments and essentially what we see is a highlight reel of ones life. It’s not the argument they had their with best friend, the moment of weakness while dieting, the mundane day to day life with their husband.
I personally have struggled with seeing so many people lose their baby bulge so quickly when I really haven’t. I could sit here and fib and tell you I have done everything right, but in reality that is just not true. I enjoy bad foods, wine and soft drink. I don’t exercise enough and I lack motivation to make any real change. Yet seeing celebrities and my friends on social media bouncing back so quickly does get to me. I compare myself and feel guilty for not doing more sooner.
What does social media do to you? I love it, it certainly has its place and has its benefits but there is a darker side to it. Comment below and let me know.
I know I told you all that my New Years resolution was to get organised! And for once I really, really want to stick to my resolution! I have decided to keep on top on everything I need to inspire myself! I’ve decided a pretty planner, that makes me happy when I open it is a great start. It’s also a great creative outlet and time for me! (Let’s face it, as mums we all love me time!) It’s one thing to get organised it’s another to stay organised!
I have turned into a real planner “nerd” and I know it’s not understood by many and a lot of you may think I am crazy but Im hoping a lot of people can relate (and I’m not alone)! So I have put my life into sections, I have a spot for this blog and then a calendar where all our appointments, my work days, my husbands work days and Rhemys activities are tracked. I have an area for expenses as we are also trying to be better with our finances too! It’s already filling up and I am feeling much more relaxed and on top of what is going on.
As for university I have decided I am going to keep that seperate! I don’t have the space for it in this one and I think it is better if I keep it seperate from my day to day life. Study reminders and assignment due dates and tracking my readings will take up so much room that I want somewhere that I won’t worry about making pretty just functional!
Our life is hectic, my days are full and this is truly helping. What do you do to keep organised? What do you do to relax or have mummy time? Comment below and let me know!
Planner from: http://www.kikki.com.au
*gifted to me from my brother.
📸 featured image: google images
📸 Blog image: my own.